This list of the dumbest criminals will make you feel like a rocket scientist. While it's nice to know that most criminals are too idiotic to follow through with their hair brained schemes, it's kind of depressing to realize how stupid a lot of people really are. The deplorable dumb dumbs on this list sound more like fictional characters than they do hardened criminals. But these crime fails are all totally real. And yes, that includes the guys who tried to rob a grocery store while riding a donkey. These are the worst criminals ever, who were just too stupid to be successful.
This collection of the dumbest criminals of all time ranges from almost the entire state of Florida, to people who committed crimes in police stations, and a guy who tried to sell weed to a detective. How do you think that ended for him?!
Hopefully after reading about the idiots on this list of dumb criminals you'll have learned some life lessons. For instance, don't try to write yourself a $360 billion check. You can't do that. No one will cash it for you. If you steal an iPad, maybe don't take selfies with everyone in your crew the moment you get back to your house. Selfies can wait for when you have changed the iCloud account to "not the original owner's." And please, stop drinking and driving - even if you're driving with one eye closed to counteract the double vision, it's just not a good idea.
Vote up the dumbest of the dumb criminals on this list of idiotic crimes that completely failed.
The 53 Dumbest Criminals Ever,
Florida Man Answers Call from Security Company During Robbery
Amateur criminal and professional dumb dumb Christopher Kron made every mistake possible in robbery history when he tried to rob a restaurant after it closed one night. Not only did he trip the silent alarm, but when ADT called the restaurant after being notified, Kron answered the phone and gave them his REAL NAME. He returned to the restaurant the next day and was recognized by an employee who had seen the surveillance video. Kron was arrested on the spot.
Source: NBC
Two Nabbed in iPad Theft When Selfies Appear on Owner's iCloud
Two men arrested in Houston were accused of stealing an iPad and using it to take selfies that they unknowingly uploaded to the owner's iCloud account. The men appeared in the photos displaying money they were also accused of taking from the victim. At least they didn't have to listen to that new U2 album!
Source: NBC
Dallas Dummy Tries to Cash Check for Billions of Dollars
Charles Ray Fuller, a Texas dumb dumb, tried to cash a bogus check for $360 BILLION. To top it off, the check wasn’t even made out to him. He was arrested on forgery charges and sentenced to a million billion years in prison.
Source: CBS
Robber Falls from Ceiling Into Police Custody
A burglar looking to make a quick score at a Dollar Store made one tiny mistake.
He climbed on the roof of the store and managed to weasel his way into the ceiling, where he promptly fell in front of a nearby Houston police officer. After picking up 10,000 Q-tips for under two dollars, the officer brought the burglar into custody.
Source: KHOU
Man Applies for Job Before Robbing Golden Pantry
Demetrius Robinson, 28, wanted to rob a Golden Pantry store late one night, but he needed to pass the time as naturally as possible until he and the clerk were alone, so he decided to fill out a job application. Not a bad idea, except he left his real name on the application, along with his uncle’s phone number. After he robbed the store, it didn’t take long for police to track him down. He didn’t get the job.
Source: Sun Journal
Man Attempts Carjacking in Prison Parking Lot
Things were looking up for Frank Singleton when he was released from jail. However, when he realized that he didn’t have a ride home, he walked straight into the prison parking lot and attempted to carjack a woman. He was foiled when he realized that he couldn’t drive a car with a stick shift. As he was re-arrested - this time, for felony carjacking - Singleton told police that he simply “didn’t feel like walking.” We've all been there.
Source: WPTV
Criminals Draw on Their Faces with Marker to Disguise Themselves
Before breaking into an apartment, Joey Miller and Matthew McNelly decided to put on disguises. And by disguises we mean they covered their faces in permanent marker. The thing about permanent marker is that... well it's permanent.
After the burglary, the pair was pulled over by police and immediately recognized because of their hair. Just kidding, it was their faces covered in permanent marker that set them apart from the crowd.
Source: The Telegraph
Florida Man Marks Occupation as Drug Dealer on Arrest Report
A West Palm Beach, FL man was arrested on a slew of charges, and was perhaps a bit too honest on his arrest report. He listed his occupation as "drug dealer" and was charged with being the most obvious criminal in the history of crime.
Source: Florida Times Union
Crooked Cop Drives Ferrari to Work
The dumbest policeman in the world, who was making some extra cash with drugs and prostitution, was brought to justice after driving a $170,000 Ferrari to work. Osman Iqbal, an officer based in Birmingham England, was jailed for seven years for running a brothel.
Source: Time
Robber Gives Cashier His Phone Number
18 year old Ruben Zarate wanted to rob a muffler shop in Chicago and demanded money. Unfortunately it was mostly in the safe. Zarate decided that he would try again later. To save himself some time, he left his cell phone number with the store employees. That way, they could call him when the manager returned.
Source: News Sentinel